So I (22 m) have been talking to an awesome lovely sweet girl (25) for about two weeks now. We hit it off right away and have so much in common. The biggest obstacle between us is distance, she lives 6 timezones away :(. I am however down to try and see where things go and maybe take a flight in a couple months if we really really like each other. We have been open and honest with each other, I feel like we can be ourselves. We already talked about childhood trauma and how we both have a huge backpack we carry with us. We are both INFP's, empaths, artsy people who have difficulty to be rational and live in reality sometimes with our dreamy texts and scenario's. Now 2 days ago we were talking about our preferences in bed. She told me about her daddy issues and that she likes to be told what to do, that she wants to please me and that she'd love to be called a "good girl" and choked, spanked, her hair pulled etc... . Now I am a very adaptive person and am down to try that stuff if it's really what she wants, but it doesn't sound natural at all for me, like I am a non agressive person, I don't like violence, and after reading up on daddy issues and how it comes from deep rooted trauma and she thinks she can only get validation and love from pleasing me...I just don't feel comfortable with it. I want to validate and love her and make her feel safe even without having sex, I just don't want her to see me as a person she needs to listen to and follow orders from just to receive praise and validation. And I'm afraid that once I might not be able to fit her picture of the way she likes it to go, she would want to find it with another guy who has a more "Alpha/daddy" way of having sex.

Any advice, any experience with this?