Sorry that the headline isn't very good. I'm still scatter-brained. And OMG! This is way more than I meant to write!

My husband of 20 years and I have lived what you'd all call 'vanilla' sex lives for the most part. I read what you all write here and I start to blush. I have never imagined us doing what most of y'all do! I enjoy reading your stories and questions and such but just putting myself into your lives feels too much out of character for us. So yeah, we're very vanilla.

Our sex has never been very adventurous, maybe a soft-core porn movie we stumble across late night while flipping through channels and maybe my toy mixed in but I've always been on the side that sex is about making love. Caressing, gentle, lots of kissing and fondling and moving of hands over each others body. That's changing!!!!! Which is very good, I hope! I think???

After this experience, I'm feeling like I went from a gentle walk to a sprinting cheetah here. I can't stop thinking about it - for good and bad. Mostly good though hehe.

How it went down. Our best friends invited us to stay at an AirBnB with them in this upscale resort village two weeks ago. There's shopping, golf, sexy nightclubs and restaurants, and just a really fun atmosphere. The AirBnb we rented had it's own pool/hot tub combo and we were in sexy overdrive the whole time. I do love to dress up and looking back, this is really as non-vanilla as we get -- dressing up and all that. No surprise then that every night when we'd get back from the nightclubs or bars, my husband and I were going at it like newlyweds. A very needed thing for us.

The four of us are all in our 40's and pretty active. I would consider us all sexy too. As 'Kim' (other wife) and I laid out by the pool, we watched our husbands lounging in the poo. Before too long we started talking about how hot our guys are. Seriously our guys are hot! As it turns out, the guys were talking about us too. Tee hee. There we were talking about how sexy we all were. It was so weird and yet so liberating. That was the first time any of us had ever really talked about sex or of the others ever.

Then 'Kim' mentions that she's noticed that we are having a lot of fun after we get back to the AirBnB at night. I was soooo embarrassed! I couldn't stop blushing or grinning. Kim kept at it and I finally had to get up and walk away. Not to be rude but to use the bathroom! I was laughing and just uncontrolled with embarrassment to the point I had to pee! The guys saw me giggling uncontrollably and me leave and asked what was up. Kim told the guys that she told me that they'd been hearing us "having fun" at night. That then spurred the guys into talking about sex between their wives! How often do guys do that??? I get back to three people all grinning and smiling at me. Kim says, "You have to give me all the juicy details". I didn't know what to do or say so I just told her "it's been a great vaca" with a grin. I don't know how to talk about sex with others. It's never been part of my life to share intimate details.

When we went out later that night, Kim and I were both wearing our skimpiest dresses and both men were wearing their sexiest shirts and pants. It was so difficult NOT to be turned on! The drinks were flowing, we were dancing, and everyone was charged up. Kim had maybe a little too much and 'Rob' suggested we head back a little early. We get back and Kim suggests we take advantage of the hot tub. Soon enough the bubbles were flowing but I could see Rob touching Kim! They kissed quickly then looked at us and at first we just kind of blew it off. So they kissed, right? Then they kissed again but for longer and definitely for show!! I was sooooooo turned on! My husband, who later told me he was turned on but feeling awkward about it, leaned in to kiss me. I melted... I mean I freaking melted! I looked over at Kim and Rob at some point and they were really really into it. So we kept kissing each other. And kissing until finally I felt my husband's hands roaming across my body. I looked over at Kim and Rob and Rob had moved Kim's top to the side and was cupping her breast. I couldn't believe my eyes!

(I had to take a break writing this... tee hee)

So we end up in the living room having sex with our best friends watching us and us watching them............... WE HAD SEX IN FRONT OF OTHERS!!!! Wow!

I would so do this again, and I hope we do at some point, however, I just can't shake how vanilla my husband I were. Are, really. Here was this couple deeply in love with each other and really going at it. Like porno style with the pounding hard and everything. She was saying all sorts of really dirty things too that was hot but shocking at the same time. Not really distracting for the most part but I did find myself kind of stopping with "did Kim really just say that?!?!?!?!" Now I have this feeling of such inadequacy compared to them. I feel like our sex life, while great, suddenly needs to be .... more??? I don't even know where to begin now either. Do I watch porn and brush up on my game? Do I read those steamy sex novels? How do I start practicing the dirty talk without giggling? It's changed my husband too since he's now asking for more. Most dirty talk but he's moved to try to be a little rougher with me and while I welcome it, it's taken me a bit of adjusting.

I have talked with Kim a lot and she insures me that we were great and really hot to hear and watch. That has helped but seeing her and thinking of her in that way has me putting her on a sex goddess pedestal. She admitted that they have done this "many times" with other couples. I had no idea!!

The tl;dr is basically: vanillas had sex in front of a 31 flavors couple and now we're excited to try more but feeling that our vanilla sex life is actually pretty bland. What do we do next?