I've recently reevaluated my goals with dating based on some recent positive experiences I had dating and realized I want to explore my sexuality more which isn't something I've done as most of my life was dominated by one LTR. I (32M) matched with a person (28, app didn't say her gender identity, just she/they) on an app today, and she indicated she is only interested in something casual because she left a LTR just a few weeks ago. They also selected the option on bumble you use for casual sex. I told her I left a LTR not too long ago too and said I get that and agree. Little back and forth about ourselves and we have a great deal in common and now we have a date picked out and she's going to get back to me soon with what time works for her. If things go well on the date I'm going to invite them back to my apartment to watch a movie. All that stuff is easy, I'm good at it. I've spent my whole life making friends with women.

Thing is, that's were it stops being easy for me. I recently found out I'm autistic, which now makes this make way more sense lol. I'm not usually meeting people with such explicit intent for a hookup. I usually rely on the other person to make the first moves with intimacy (they'll flirt, I'll reciprocate, and so on until the intent for sex is firmly established), which shockingly has had a high success rate when I'm in these situations, but I want to get better at making the first move myself. This is moving faster than I normally move, the earliest I've had sex is on a second date, and that was only after we had been talking for 2 weeks or so non stop constantly and flirting heavily at the end of that.

My questions are:

• Is it appropriate to flirt prior to the first meet up? What level of flirting is appropriate (could you give examples)?

• I always ask about a partners recent sexual history and when their last STD test was. Usually I'm given a better opportunity to bring it up prior to anything because the messaging has turned sexual prior to it happening. How/when do I bring it up here? Should I wait until we are together and it becomes crystal clear where things are going and then decide how much I'm willing to do based on her answer? If I need to bring it up earlier than that, how do I do so without making it sound like I'm just assuming she will sleep with me?

• Once we are back at my place, should I even attempt to start anything non verbally? Should I just say something like, "you can cuddle with me if you'd like during the the movie" to give her a chance to get cozy with me? Every single time me and someone try to initiate a kiss for the first time while on the couch it's awkward as hell. Now things are fine once we start actually kissing, but the whole initiating the kiss, particularly while on a couch, is just... always awkward. Is that just how things are for everyone? If not what is the secret?

I'm always worried about making people uncomfortable and misinterpreting what the situation is (even though that has never happened). Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks! Also, it's worth noting while we didn't talk a whole lot, at the end of the conversation I picked up neurodivergent vibes from them, so being more direct and using our words might be easier for her as well.