I (cisgender 43f) have never been one to take care of myself. I’ve always had a partner who did that for me. Even as a teenager, I would do it a little, but never get close to finishing. I’ve reached a point in my life where the last 2 relationships have left me so sexually traumatized, I’m unable to trust another person in such an intimate way for the time being. It’s been almost a year since I’ve had sex. That’s the 4 times longer than my longest stretch since I started having sex in the first place. I’m sure you can imagine, I’m going crazy. I’m voluntarily celibate, but I can’t even get myself off to make things not so bad.

My question is - what toys are out there that could help me not need a partner while I get my issues resolved? What toys would be good for a beginner? What toys really get the job done, regardless of experience?