I’ve started seeing a guy who I really like. I find him charming, cute, and sexy. Tonight we hooked up, and I discovered he’s uncut. I’m embarrassed to admit that that’s a turn off for me. I myself am cut and I have mostly hooked up with cut guys. I don’t have a lot of experience with uncut dicks, and in general the thought of them weirds me out.

This hangup of mine killed my boner and I wasn’t able to get hard for the rest of the evening. I felt really bad because I find the rest of his body super sexy. We had fun cuddling anyway. I didn’t tell him about my issue because I realize it’s MY issue and I didn’t want him to feel bad. He did notice I wasn’t able to get hard though.

I want to get past my aversion so I can be turned on by all of him. How can I do that? Should I open up to him and ask him to work with me? Should I find a therapist who can help me figure out why I’m like this and how I might be able to change?

I imagine lots of people encounter something like this, where your partner’s body doesn’t match up with your idealized version of them. How did you work through it?