I am a 41M and have been married to my wife 41F for over a decade. Ever since I was young, I have had issues cumming. Sex feels great and I occasionally do cum, but I always take a long time, over well over an hour.

I think it might have to do with my PC muscle, since I have often peed and pause peeing or held off or whatever just...for funsies...sometimes. And just last night it hit me that it constantly feels like I am ready to cum but I just am flexing a muscle and can't let go. I can temporarily let go and then release precum, but I just inadvertently go back to clenching again. It keeps me harder (I think) with blood flow constricted and I just...can't...stop.

But I know it is frustrating for my wife. Most people don't want to be banged into for an hour. So...how can I just let go? How can I relax enough to actually cum? How can I cum in just a few minutes? Please help! Everything I find online is the opposite problem, where people haven't exercised it and need to last longer.