Im feeling really conflicted and need some advice. My boyfriend and I were together for two years before breaking up for about a year. During our relationship, our sex life was okay—not amazing but good enough at the time. I often had to make myself finish with his help because he doesn’t like to be touched much, and he’s not into certain things I really enjoy, like giving/receiving oral. I’m also naturally more submissive, but so is he, which makes things feel a bit mismatched.

During our time apart, I had some great sexual experiences with others (though the emotional connection wasn’t there like it is with him), but now that we’re back together, I’ve realized I’m really unhappy with our sex life. It feels like I’m always catering to him, and when I try to communicate what I want or need, he kind of shuts down and says he doesn’t know what to do.

I don’t even feel like I want to have sex with him anymore because I’m frustrated and don’t feel heard. this is such a huge part of the relationship for me, and I don’t know how to move forward and it’s almost making me have a distaste for him

Has anyone dealt with something similar? How do you communicate these things without hurting your partner? Is it even possible to fix something like this or am I just horrible?

I’m open to answer any questions