My partner (23f) and I (26m) took each others virginities when we first started dating 5 years ago. So we both didn’t have much other sexual experience. Prior to this I was always slightly insecure about my penis size and knew it was small. When we started dating it wasn’t really an issue for her so I moved past that. As our relationship progressed we started playing with toys and I realized how turned on I got seeing her use a big dildo and how good that made her feel. This made me start to think about my penis size again, except this time I realized my small size really turned me on and bigger cocks made me hard and I wanted to play with them myself too.

Since then we have done a few threesomes with guys which are great, but they aren’t something we can do often. However this is one of the few times I actually feel like I truly get the feeling I want.

What’s hard is it feels like a lot of the suggestions or ways of exploring these kinks are by extremes “I can barely feel your little tiny dick” etc when I know that’s not true… It’s like I need ways of exploring that feel more grounded in reality. For example if she tells me one of the guys from the threesomes larger penis felt more constant on her G Spot, I know that’s not made up.

This same kind of extreme vs what’s realistic goes into other related parts of the kink like liking the feeling of feeling feline bc of my small package (sissy stuff is too extreme for me).

Basically, it feels just hard to find a happy medium that is also realistic with some of these kinks.