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As long as I remember, I’ve always mentally separated sex from the relationship. Things seem fine when I’m with a partner and non-sexual things are happening - chatting through text, going out to eat, doing a shared activity, etc. When it gets to the sex aspect, I am only able to perform and enjoy it by pretending my partner is a prostitue or she and I are both porn actors, or I’m with someone brand new, things like that. I’m essentially not able to be intimate with my partner if she’s my partner, if that makes sense.
How do I get to where sex is a shared aspect of intimacy between two people who care about each other?
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