So I (20 M) , have found women extremely sexy and sexually attractive , and have been a somewhat avid masturbator for most of my post-pubescent life , all of that said ,when it comes to the actual thought of having sex , it grosses my out.

Let me explain.

For me , the thought of inserting a penis into a vagina , grosses me out it , infact it even scares me as im afraid it will hurt not only me , but my partner as well (i have heard that sex works this way ) , but its not just that , even the thought of rubbing my penis against a vagina disgusts me , i simply find it unappealing, furthermore , most of my guy friends have told me about how when they think about -having sex , they want to , and do , touch every part of a womans body , and although i do imagine doing things like that , the idea of doing it to an actual women feels wrong and uncomfortable.

So i'm very confused , and wanted to know if anyone has had similar experiences or an explanation as to why i am this way.

Ps : i dont know if this is useful information , but whenever i masturbate , i dont use the traditional approach of wrapping my hands around my weiner , but rather push my dick up and down on a bed in order to feel stimulated , perhaps this might be relevant? Idk