23M. I understand this is a fairly common problem for afab people, only being able to cum a certain way lying on your back, but I’ve dealt with it for a long time with a penis. I can only cum if I’m on my back, and I tense my legs.

I’m positive this stems from 10 years of only getting myself off in my bed, and I’ve definitely developed the “death grip”. But now I’m in my first proper relationship and she cannot make me cum.

My girlfriend (24F) loves to suck my dick (bless her heart) which feels good, but I come nowhere near orgasm. Usually what happens is, she’ll do that for a bit until her jaw gets sore and then I’ll jerk myself off while she watches and gets a lil cum shower (🤭) She’s understanding and we’re pretty compatible sexually, but is this fixable?? I’m willing to hold off on masturbation for a good while if it means I can cum standing up, either fucking or via oral.