I've always wondered if I'm pan, and perhaps even genderfluid/agender. I'm curious though, as if I intentionally, consciously consider dating a woman/non-man I could do it and be fine (on the basis of it pleasing them, more than me being attracted to them that much).

But strangely, I find I'm incredibly sexually attracted to women who look like a more sexualised/'sexy' version of me. When I watch those kinds of videos online, I always look for women who're like me in that respect, and my brain beelines automatically to if I looked and acted as they are in the video, and what a man I'm really attracted to would think/feel. That's almost always the primary reason I'm turned on by these women.

Seeing a really attractive woman, who I'm personally sexually and romantically attracted to too, is always with the prerequisite of 1: me almost emotionally vicariously living through their attractiveness in my fantasies, and 2: being super turned on by what men I'm really attracted to would think of that version of me.

I kind of have no idea what this is — should I be concerned?