Just seeing what's out there. Regardless of your personal beliefs I have a hyper focused disorder (and bs filter) and have personally experienced alot of hypocrisy in religion. That being said I'm sex positive but I've spent the better part of a decade battling something. I was raised in a sober house and avoided most substances. though I had good intentions in my heart, I had a habit of over estimating my abilities in relationships, using sex under my standards to emotionally self harm after break ups and during fights, and stim using feeds of random nudes without any intention of masterbating or anything. 😒😒 I'm in a ltr with an understanding partner but in having a safe place to heal, I'm ashamed of my own past trending toxicities to the point of not really even having a sex drive and making me really fear relationships and receiving attraction in a way I would have never comprehended when I was younger.