I didn't want to post in dating or relationship advice nor bdsm advice subs because this isn't a typical relationship or bdsm sub. Sorry for the roller coaster rant ahead.

A little background info: I'll be 23 in a couple months and have been with my boyfriend/Dom (46m) for 5 months. We met off a kink related r4r I posted and hit it off almost immediately. The only other big bump we've had in our relationship was a month into knowing each other, he'd leave me on read a lot (turned out he was at work and couldn't text me back but would open my texts. He's completely stopped after I told him it bothered me and I'll rate our communication as ok but mostly one sided) We're relatively drama free which is exactly how I like it but I guess that's because we only see each other once a week for a couple days at a time whenever possible.

We are in a poly relationship where. I date individually. We don't discuss what goes on outside of us except std/sti things because I feel like that's important that he knows I'm clean and safe. It works for us because he's pretty mid libido while I'm very high - although I still don't have enough sex for my needs lmao.

This man has such a special place in my heart. I've been honest and told him I love him. I wouldn't call it in love love but he's super awesome to me. I'm pansexual and naturally poly leaning but since I have feelings for him, I want to see him most frequently.

I'm not clingy or pushy about it...I don't think... but I do often text him "I miss you"/ "when will I see you next handsome". We used to flirt and he'd let me send him nudes a lot but now he told me to put on clothes the last time that happened so I haven't nude bombed him since. I also never told him how much that bothered me and he hasn't seemed to notice the lack of pictures. I find this to be wack as hell too but maybe he never was really into it.

At the start of us dating we saw each other every weekend and that worked because I would take Saturday off work whenever possible but his work schedule changed so now it's during the week. Lots of unsavory personal crap has happened to me since then as a result of long COVID and now I don't go to school or have my job. I'm not looking for casual sex as often nowadays because of my health changes. I've told him I need more of him though. I hope I'm imagining that he just kind of brushed me off.

I decided to just blame his work for why nothing has changed.

HOWEVER.

I've also noticed our sex life has changed. He's a lot more selfish and has completely stopped giving me oral. I didn't ask him why he's stopped or why he's being less caring during sex but I have clearly told him during sex I want him to eat me out.

At the time, he kind of just kissed around the area but didn't go for it.😒🙄 We had piv and I started to orgasm as it went on but then he got soft (he has ED). He apologized like always but then just laid down. I'm not exactly shy and I'm far from dominant but I did take his hand and put it between my legs. Literally nothing happened. And not one to beat a dead horse, I started watching tv myself. Maybe he was finished for the moment. I would t force him.

The day carried on normally. We had sex a few more times until bedtime and he had his usual softness problems, I never complained because why would I when he can't help it. I did complain about not cumming even once after all the creampies I let him give me. I'm usually a tough nut to crack when it comes to orgasms and sex is mostly just pleasurable fun for me but we go at at at least 7 times and he cums at least 5 despite everything. I don't think it's fair he doesn't even try to finish me off anymore.

Anyways. I stayed the night and went home the next morning. I distinctly remember texting him while I was in the cab that I was unsatisfied and deserved at least one orgasm and more cuddles. Was that not clear enough that he needs to do more??

We didn't see each other for a few weeks after that because I was in the hospital again though. That's fine.

Fast forward, it's now la few weeks later in Feb and I still get no orgasms and he was still being stingy. I was too stressed out and extra horny because stress does that to my broken brain. So I didn't rectify it. I didn't keep talking about it like I usually would and I buried my feelings and just tried to enjoy our time together. I didn't feel like being bothered with it so I'll accept that I should have communicated better at that point. I needed aftercare and didn't advocate for myself even though I knew better.

It's just that for the most part, I'm ready to get back into the swing of things. I'm lost about what to say or if I should even keep trying with him. I really appreciate our relationship but it feels stupid when I keep asking for what I want and not getting it. I've been feeling like I'm doing this whole thing wrong.

It was really hard to find someone like him and I dread the process so I don't want to lose him. I also don't want to become a nuisance. My heart and head are at odds. Am I being pushy or immature here? Maybe it's not rational that I expect things to be like they were when we first met?

I don't think these are unreasonable requests because I give him head quite often when we're together and cater to his needs as often as I can.

TLDR: My (F22) boyfriend (m46) doesn't even try to finish me off or give me oral anymore and I've already spoken to him about it a few times so I'm tired of bringing it up basically.