Hello, everyone!

I'm reaching out because I'm currently facing some significant challenges in my relationship and could really use some advice or perspective from others.

I've been in a relationship with this girl for 6 months. The first 3-4 months were perfect; we were deeply in love, and we have not hidden it from each other. Then problems started arising: first, her parents were against our relationship due to the 7-year gap (she's 24, I'm close to 31), and that put some pressure on her. Then she got upset with the fact that I was picking her up from home with a car that had a damaged door.

To provide some context, it was a car I bought in a previous relationship for my ex to drive. She got into a crash, and we split up soon after that. I hadn't used nor fixed the car for months 'cause I didn't know what I will do with it, I was considering selling it as it is, 'til I had to sell my car and met this girl at the same time. So, I had to use this one, and I kept delaying getting it fixed because it was the only way I could pick her up from home. There's a bit of distance between where I live and where she lives, and she came over every weekend, so I would pick her up each time. Getting the car fixed would have taken more than a week with the way mechanics work and I kept delaying doing it 'cause I was planning on buying a new car.

Then she saw some of my instagram interactions (likes and she said she saw some comments too) with some girls in between my previous relationship and her and that upset her. We were not together when that happened.

Then she said she's feeling like we're not going out enough (even though we did, and each time we went out we both wanted to go to my place asap to spend time together in private) and said that's because I'm not initiating (she's attending a rather challenging college programme, we discussed in the beginning and she told me it's keeping her very busy, so I told her that I'll be understanding and try to not put too much pressure on her regarding seeing each other, I was suggesting from time to time but I tried not stressing her out too much).

To top it off, a month ago my girlfriend found out she has HPV16, and she's is sure she got it from me because she got tested last year and it was negative. She says I'm the only other person she had sex with except for the guy she was already in a relationship at that time. I had no unprotected sex in between my previous long term relationship (my ex was tested too and it was negative) and her, but I know that it can be passed with a condom too, so I assumed it me who she got it from. This thing has understandably put a strain on our relationship, and she's hesitant about whether we can continue together. She feels devastated and stained by my past, and despite our deep love for each other, she doesn’t see a future for us because of this.

Despite her pain and feeling of being stained by my past, we're still in contact every day. We express our love for each other, we've met multiple times since the diagnosis, sharing intense emotional moments (tears involved from both parties), but she doesn’t believe our relationship can continue.
I feel an immense sense of guilt for what has happened. I never intended to hurt her, and now I’m desperate to make things right, salvage our relationship, and take care of her. But I’m at a loss for what to do next.

Two days ago I asked for some clarification about where we're at and if she's still willing to salvage the relationship, since the current situation is very confusing (she tells me she loves me very much then she rejects me saying she feels we need to distance ourselves from each other), I tried doing it as carefully as I could but she said that if I want an answer now, then I can go back to the dating apps (in between her and the previous partner, I had Bumble installed twice, each time for a week, went out on dates with 2 girls and she was aware of that before we even met, through some mutual acquaintances) while I was just asking because I want to know where we're at from her point of view and what her current feelings are.

In the beginning, our relationship felt incredibly intense and wholehearted. We were obsessed with each other, and it felt like nothing could tear us apart. However, it seems like she may have become scared of the depth of our feelings. It feels like she's been searching for signs that I may not be as good as she initially thought I was. I'm doing my best to fix it, but it feels like no matter what I do, another problem arises, another thing I do that's wrong. It's disheartening, to say the least.

I feel very lost, I am depressed, I am randomly tearing up daily. I've envisioned a future with this woman like I've never felt before. We were very much in love. We've tried discussing these issues, but it often feels like we're not making much progress. Lately, when I express my perspective or reasons behind certain actions, she feels like I'm playing the victim. She brings up that she's still talking to me after everything that happened and that's what she gets: me playing the victim.

I'm looking for any advice, insights, or similar experiences from those who have been through similar situations. How can we navigate these challenges and rebuild trust and communication in our relationship?