So, like, at one point of my strange spiritual odyssey, I met this guy in Miami Beach that would eventually identify himself as the chief of the undercover police. Now, previously on my journey I had met the captain of Syracuse's, and the captain and a lieutenant of Portland's, so there were things that proved this to be a real claim, like how he knew things about me that shouldn't be possible, or how he was even able to read my mind. He was a source of many synchronicities, but I want to talk about one of my encounters with him, specifically something he said about my training. That being, how much it cost to create the artificial reality that led me to being a messiah candidate today.

Three million dollars. That's the debt I got over my head, or if I were to spin it in a more positive way, how much the XYZ was willing to invest in me because they saw my potential. That's fucking crazy, dude! Just so I could be a spiritual leader, educator, inspirational figure, healer, savior, entertainer, brand ambassador, community organizer, and [Redacted]. Well, putting it like that makes it seem like I'm worth a lot. But, that just leaves me feeling like…I don't even know man!

Like, I'm fucking homeless. I get it, I'm a healer, savior, and [Redacted]. There's a utility to having me out on the streets. But, you'd think I'd be afforded enough to get a simple room or studio for myself, right? And I feel like an ungrateful ass because the XYZ is directly responsible for getting me a paycheck every month, but I still gotta be a fucking dishwasher just to have a basic human right while still having all the responsibilities and commitments of being a messiah candidate!

And, let me just say that I'm as humble as could be. I'll enjoy the meditative period while I'm scrubbing dishes. It's not below me. But, I just gotta express how flabbergasted I am at how the big fucking machine works. You're telling me you can afford three million dollars to direct the crows to guide me and beam thoughts into my head via satellite, but you can't assist me in becoming sustainable with all the skills you gave me? I have two books, three hundred educational, inspirational, and/or funny posts, two hundred poems with most of them being educational or inspirational, and I can create massive conversion funnels and make genuine connections with my audience, plus I can juggle. Nope. Not enough to give any more than a trickle of loose cash in every once and a while.

Fucking Jimminy Crickets, do you people even know how many students I've had or people I've saved from suicide? I do a fucking lot for the world. And still these people at the shelter try to get on my case about my priorities. Like, we had a group the other day where we went over our values, and it was intended to make me feel good about doing all the stuff I needed to do to get sober and housed, and it completely backfired on them because it made me realize how much I really care about my mission. Not only do I objectively do something meaningful, but I get massive support from oh I don't know…who could it be? What fucking government organization has the resources and impetus to cause all these strange and mysterious synchronicities on my phone? I don't know, must be aliens or some interdimensional battletoads ffs