To Whom It May Concern,

I'm reaching out regarding the possibility of a threesome, either heteroflexible or leaning bi. I believe I am both qualified and a good fit to join a couple for a threesome with the end goal of all around satisfaction, fulfillment of fantasies and sex that gets so sweaty and wild we leave the mattress with PTSD.

EXPERIENCE

I have some

REFERENCES

"Awesome dude. Chill, respectful, freaky without being crazy and super fun to hang out with. You're guaranteed to have a good time."

-someone that's not me

"GREAT dick, that he knows how to use very well. 4 healthy, girthy eggplants out of 5, would 100% fuck again." (can't use emojis, so had to get creative LOL)

-totally someone that isn't me either

"He's a'ight."

-actually me

ATTRIBUTES/SKILLS

1. Excellent communicator

2. Health and hygiene conscious. Regularly tested, most recently on 10/30/24. Proficient in usage of soap, water, AND deodorant, cause I'm fancy like that

3. Intimate familiarity with and usage of consent and respecting boundaries. I pride myself on being aware of a partner's body language, and of course verbal communication. I never have to be told "No" twice if something doesn't feel right

4. Self awareness of my own limits and boundaries, as well as interests and curiosities. View sex, especially a threesome like this, as an adventure to enjoy, and not necessarily as an avenue to get off. Though orgasms are very nice too, don't get me wrong

5. Kink friendly, non judgmental and passingly familiar with BDSM. But also know enough to know what I don't know. Safety is first for me no matter what we get into, and if you're more knowledgeable about something I'm humble enough to follow your lead

6. Have a genuinely big dick. Not leading with this because it's not as important as what's above, but in case it ups my chances...

7. Looking for sooner rather than later. We're all adults with busy lives, which I totally understand. And this is also a thing some couples only do every now and then, which I also totally respect. But am no longer looking for someone who takes months to find some free time in their schedule. So please keep that in mind before reaching out

MISCELLANEOUS

1. I'm more looking for a heteroflexible threesome, where he's heteroflexible, bi or at least bi-curious. Straight threesomes are fun, don't get me wrong. But it's more fun when we're all comfortable enough to touch and enjoy each other to some degree without one of us guys getting squicked out. We can talk limits and comfort levels to make sure we're all open to the same things, and of course boundaries will be respected at all times

Weakness include: Latinx/Asian playmates, either male or female.

For him: moderate to medium body hair, slightly stocky to muscular build, 7" or more endowment, and love uncut guys.

For her: anywhere from petite to curvy. I'm 6'1", so love when I'm able to pick her up and fuck her standing. I'm a sucker for big boobs (5/5 pun there; your applause is welcome), but just love the female form. Love when she isn't dominant per se, but assertive enough to chase her pleasure, and possibly even use me a bit to get it

1. I'm a SINGLE GUY, looking for a COUPLE. 99% will get this, even without reading my post. But that 1% of guys just send a blind DM. So I'm including this so that I'm justified calling you a fucking idiot if you're in that 1% and you message me

2. I've put some effort into this post, describing myself and what I'm looking for. I don't need or expect your life story, but please put some effort into telling me a bit about yourselves and what caught your eye, what your interests are, etc. when reaching out. I tend to ignore one line replies or requests for pics in a first message, cause they've always led to the other person wasting my time