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I have been suffering from what I think is retroactive envy OCD for a while, and the only thing that has made me feel better (temporarily) is smoking or ingesting weed (edibles).
When I am under the influence, even though I am still aware of my obsessive thoughts and compulsions, they seem to not matter much anymore. Instead of feeling the overwhelming anxiety, I just notice the thought and go "Wow, I don’t have this feeling like someone just punched me in the stomach right now." All I feel is peace, calmness, and sadness for my sober self.
I am curious if anyone has a similar experience.
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- 4 months ago
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