Hi! I live with my single mother who divorced after my father cheated (relevant?) I have been dating my girlfriend for over a year already but it's only recently that my mother found out that it was a lesbian relationship.

My girlfriend is trans, but only started transitioning this year, and met me while presenting male. We didn't tell my mother about this shift and she just kept presenting male around my mother, who didn't really seem to notice or care about what was happening. My gf has:

• worn women's blouses in front of my mother
• changed her voice from a masculine one to a super small and cute feminine voice
• gotten her ears pierced
• grown her hair out
• changed her name on social media and uses it in daily life
• grown a modest pair of breasts and tiny other changes from hormones

But none of this seemed to ring any bells until my mom saw my gf in a dress on TikTok. She then freaked out and (she doesn't know my gf is trans) is convinced that my gf is a confused man who will eventually come out as trans and leave me for a man.

It's worth nothing we are in a culture that has very bad LGBT representation and my mother cannot comprehend the idea of a trans lesbian. Trans people are common and tolerated in my country but the assumption is that they're all straight, and the purpose of transition is to attract the desired sex by "becoming the opposite"

She doesn't have any personal vendetta against my gf, even saying we should "be best friends if she decides to transition" but she insists I should leave her because:

• "later on when he realizes he wants to be a woman she'll just go after men so you're alone"
• "you will never be satisfied with another woman, you are straight because you had a boyfriend before" (to her bi people are just confused)
• "i don't want you to be shamed by him making a mockery out of you, you are delusional and blinded by love if you think you'll be happy dating a woman"
• "you're always so kind and understanding you shouldn't compromise in love, you need a strong man to protect you since you grew up without a father"
• "that's not okay, God will punish you"

So we are in a bit of a sticky situation. She thinks I'm dating a straight man who occasionally crossdresses and is leaving us with an uneasy peace. But she was angry that this was kept from her for so long and eventually the real truth will come out because my gf gets more feminine every day.

Then she'll get angry again because we didn't tell her, but I don't know how to tell the whole story as it is right now. I have a lot going on in my life and I don't have the energy to explain something that she can't understand while getting yelled at over and over into the wee hours of the morning, I just want to date my gf.

tl;dr: mom found out my bf is queer and does not know yet he is actually my gf, and this is a ticking time bomb