Long post alert.

My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months now, most of it long distance. We met online and couldn't stop texting, skyping, etc. connected on another level. I met her after about 3 months in person, and that was amazing too. Over the next 4 months, I met her in person about once a month. Now we're in the same city for 3 months before I have to go away to college again.

We've had our issues too. She used to be friends with an ex whom she dated about 6 years ago. They hung out a lot in groups. I was a little uncomfortable with this, but i trusted her a lot and she never gave me a reason not to, so I made my peace with it. One night, she called me up tearfully explaining that she was really drunk, and the ex had come to pick her up to go to a mutual friend's place to party, and they had ended up kissing for a bit (he wasn't drunk) before she realized what was happening and asked him to leave. Because she stopped it, asked him to leave and told me about it right away, I was able to overcome my feelings of betrayal. Over the next few weeks she made efforts to allay my fears and answer my questions, and I still trusted her at this point.

After we were in the same city, we would meet almost every day, spend nights together, go partying - the works. After a while though, she started being just a little distant from me - which she had never been, not even when at a physical distance. She confessed that she thought she had feelings for another girl, and wanted to tell me to be honest with me. My initial reaction was to be really upset and sarcastic, but she told me that she still loves me, and wants to be with me - this was just a crush. I understand that crushes happen even when in a relationship, and told her to think about it and take time off if need be. Shr asked if I'd still be ready to be with her if she took some time to think, and after hesitating a bit, I said I would. I told her to explore it completely and only come back to me if she was 100% sure that she wanted to be with me and only me. She texted the very next day saying that she can't not talk to me, and that her feelings for the new girl reduced once she got rid of that guilt and confronted them. We talked a little and I accepted that. She continued to be a little distant, and I became a bit insecure though, and I told her that- that I would need her reassurance. I was insecure especially because of what she'd just told me, and I told her that all she needed to do was reassure me. I didn't tell her not to talk to the new girl, I even considered calling her out with us to party, but then decided to give it more time until I was truly okay with the whole situation.

I spent the day with her two days ago, we just chilled, slept, ran some errands - very normal stuff. I was feeling like things are coming back to normal. I had to go back home because I live with my parents, and she told me she'd be going out to a friend's place to party. That day her phone stopped working, so I told her to please message me once she reached the friend's place, because she was going there late at night, alone without a phone in an unsafe city. I even asked her to send her friend's phone number and to carry the pepper spray that I'd gifted her. She didn't message me and I was getting worried, so I found out Her friend's number from a mutual friend and called her up. She said that there had never been a plan for them to hang out, and they hadn't spoken in a long while. I realized that that also meant that she'd lied to me the week earlier about going to this same friend's place.

I knew she didn't have a phone, so I messaged her on facebook saying that I called her friend, and what is going on. I went to sleep.

Next morning, she said that she's sorry for not texting me that she reached, she forgot. And that she never went out, she was tired so she spent the night in. I confronted her further and then the truth came out- that she'd spent both times with the girl she told me she had a crush on. She said they only partied in a group, nothing happened, and she lied because she knew that I was restless and insecure about her spending time with the new girl, and didn't want it to sabotage our relationship. I got really mad, and said some things to the effect of 'we can't do this for the future, not if its like this.' She told me not to say that, that she was truly sorry the way she'd handled things, and that she would contact me when she got home and was less hungover, and would talk to me a little calmly.

That was yesterday morning, and she still hasn't contacted me. I sent her a message at night, telling her not to ignore me, that we have a chance of working it out if we talk. I can see that she's read the message, and no reply.

I'm at the end of my patience and am ready to end it, but I just want to give it a few days in case she's just being too scared to contact me. And I would like to end it in person, not over text. If she doesn't respond in a few days though, it's over right there.

I know this behaviour is unacceptable. Lying, then ignoring me. I just can't reconcile how loving she usually is, with this sudden behaviour. I can't accept it, and I want to hear it from her mouth.

Advice? Should I end it right away or wait for her to contact me? Please don't give me a knee-jerk 'dump her' opinion.

tl;dr: Caught girlfriend lying about spending time with girl she said she has a crush on, now she is ignoring me. Should I end it?