Hi,

Me 32M and my gf 26F have been together for almost a year now, throughout this year we fought and had arguments multiple times and when that happens usually it ends up with her completely blocking off communication with me (blocking on snapchat, whatsapp) before the cutting off usually it escalates with me trying to get her to calm down or make it right; it never works...

When I have a difference with someone I usually solve things before I sleep, i dont leave any bad feeling. But my gf is the complete opposite of me when dealing with conflicts. She told me multiple times if she gets angry and get off that means i'm important and thats how she deals with conflict (either that or completely cutting off people) I understand that this is unhealthy but my words can't change things. Thats her way of coping...

Now I need a way to manage this difference so that everything goes smooth; the last 4 or 5 fights all went the same:

1- I did something that offended her 2- She starts talking in a bad way 3- She starts disrespecting 4- I try to make things right 5 - She thinks that i disregard her opinion/problem 6- She cuts off communication 7- I persist to make things right 8- She blocks and keeps some places not blocked 9- i wait a few days 10- send her a message on the unblocked place 11- she is calm 12- she says she likes to make me feel bad since she's getting back at me (childish non team behaviour) 13- she says every time we fight she loves me more (childish) 14- I tell her that I dont mean to offend her, that I love her so i cant possibly mean to offend her 15- a few months pass by, another issues arrises

I know this is unhealthy; but for the first 4 fights she had every reason to be offended by my dumbass; the thing is the first 2 fights let her be like this (anytime she has a 50 50, to be angry or let it pass, shes gonna choose violence)

I've seen loyalty from her, this is a person I want to take care of and if she wont change (for now for whatever reason (distrust, trust issues, my past) I wanna take matters in my own hand

Anyone have an idea on how to fix our issues and be a team relationship (mindset shift)

Ps. Leaving her is not an option, I'll fight for her

Thank you

TLDR: I need to manage the fights that lead to disrespect and then to temporary breakups