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10
I relapsed
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I gave in as soon as a plug texted me and I even lost money out of it yet again! When would I learn? Yes it felt good to smoke and get it and do my normal routine and feel alive. Prior I was in bed the whole week not wanting to do anything just sleep sleep sleep…I feel like a loser. Like how can I give in so easily! The holidays are coming up and I wanna enjoy them and take it all in…not be all up and down in the house cleaning over and over and hiding away from family and friends…what is wrong with me. I don’t see how people can be normal and have an active addictions like nothing….its hard living a double life. Is it worth being sober seriously in this so messed up world?

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2 months ago