It's almost the anniversary of my mom leaving. My small family (husband and 2 young kids) lived on and off with my parents while I underwent cancer treatments. At this time I was going through radiation (that ended up as a third degree burn).

On this morning I get up and get the kids ready and I take them by myself to the dentist. They were 6 and newly 2. It was something that I probably shouldn't have done but I pushed myself to be better then I was. I asked my nmom if she could watch my kids. ( my oldest stayed home from school because of the appointment) that way I can I go to a pta meeting in the afternoon. She told me that it was okay and that was it. It was just a normal day. All through my life I was just okay with my mom. Never close, but I thought between being a mother myself and her helping me through my illness would change. For the first time ever it felt like we had a connection.

Spoiler alert: I was wrong.

When I painfully get home regretting that I hadn't had help with my children. My nmoms new (to her) car was gone. Once I get the kids in a took meds to start making the pain lessen (nothing too crazy). I call her. Shes half way to the next state. My grandma is "ill" okay whatever I find alternative care for my children and kept going.

A few days later she calls dad. She wants a divorce.

Since then shes came back a handful of times for random reason. A surgery of mine. My kids shared birthday party and Easters (which always doubles as my birthday) but atleast 2 times a years.

She never calls and when I contact her shes always negative and spiteful. So I decided that if she wants to have a relationship with me or my kids it's up to her. For my mental health I just cant anymore.

She messaged me today of the book of faces asking about my children's up coming birthday. I told her that we are not having a party and that they would prefer having stuff to do outside of the home (we home school) or that the kids would just like to see her. (She hasn't been here since Easter and my children adore her) she starts complaining that she cant move out of my grandmas because my dad isn't making our house payments (I live here until I can turn my Bill's on. It sucks but I have lights here so I'm doing what I can) .

I dont give a fuck mom. I cant even celebrate my kids birthday because I'm completely fucked. I dont care that you cant move out of your mothers house that you chose. Even though you blame me for not living my dad sooner. ( she blames my health and me having kids for her staying as long as she did)

I just want to turn my utilities back on in my own home. And be home for Christmas because we havent celebrated Christmas in our own home for years. (I have had cancer but cancer free now)

Hours after my nmom messaged my mil (who is a justno) called offering to throw my kids and party so at least my kids can celebrate.

In my late 20s and I have never felt so fucking stuck.