Some background. My mother is a Narcissist. I am 28 years old, and although it sounds crazy, I very recently just realized that I have been the victim of mental, emotional, and (on a few occasions) physical abuse. I have recently started seeing a therapist for only the second time in my life. The last time i saw a mental health professional, it was because I was threatening to kill myself. I was 13 and put on 80mg/day of celexa for a big chunk of middle school.

I stopped speaking to my mother in November. She said some horrible things about my at the time Fiancee and her mother (who was dying of uterine cancer, she died on December 5th. Since her parents were financially ruined from the cancer diagnosis, and I knew from the terrible things that happened at my brother's wedding that it would not be a good idea to ask my parents to ask for money to get married, we decided to do it at the courthouse. Quick, cheap, and all we really needed. You can imagine how that went over. That was the last time i spoke to my mother over the phone.

Now for the problem. Since I was finished my second college degree and didn't have a permanent mailing address, I used their address for my old employer. Now they have my W2 and my mother refuses to forward it to me in the mail. She has told me, "if you want it you know where it is", and is essentially holding my tax document hostage to try to force me to come to her house. I contacted my father (who is a good man and just as abused as I am, but bows to her authority) and he told me he would get it to me, but then she sent me a text message saying "Thats not going to work. If you want it you know where it is". I do not see anything constructive or positive that could come from me going to her house, only an opportunity for my feelings to be invalidated and for me or my wife to be verbally abused.

I'm not sure what I should do. Advice?

Edit: I should clarify that she also has my birth certificate in a safe. While i could just order another one, I do not want her to have a copy. Also, my old employer is about as incompetent as they come so I wouldn't count on getting another copy by April.