yesterday my mom said she’s frustrated that she doesn’t get much alone time with my 10 yr old sister because she’s “attached to me at the hip” and she ended up taking her out to dinner and left me home, telling me to just make myself some toast or something (there’s barely anything to eat in the house and she gets mad if i touch anything that’s hers) (yes i have an eating disorder because of her) but a few weeks ago she told me that she realized she took for granted how i’m the only one out of my siblings who has a close relationship with my little sister and actually wants to spend time with her. usually my mom goes to her boyfriends house all the time anyway and leaves me to take care of my sister. but now suddenly it’s an issue because she feels left out or jealous or something. she’s separated me and my sister before for the same reason because she thinks we’re “ganging up on her” or she just feels left out when we’re bonding together. but it’s okay when she is using me as a babysitter. it’s just so frustrating. she treated me like shit all day yesterday just because she was in a bad mood and i can’t say any of this is unexpected or out of the ordinary, she’s been like this for so long but i wish i could get used to it or that it didn’t hurt me as much as it does. sometimes i wonder why i still try to have a relationship with her when she will clearly never change and it always just ends up hurting me. i guess i still love my mom so i keep trying, i can’t help it