I need to preface this by saying I'm married to a black women and have two mixed teenage boys. Sucks I have to preface with that for fear I will be called racist and downvoted.

So here is my issue and what i think is a major problem to addressing racism and systematic racism. There is a major problem in our country that we can not have open and honest discussions about race without the other side getting defense.

If a white person wants to talk about concerns or ideologies regarding racism like mentioning lack of black father figures inside urban areas they are immediately shut down as not understand and called racist. If a black dude wants to talk about his experiences dealing with systematic racism many whites will get defensive and feel like they are being attacked.

This is a major issue. Why cant people share there concerns, experiences and ideologies without being attacked or feeling guilty. In order to address issues people need to learn about the other side but in our society we can't do that publicly because whites have fear off being shut down as a racist. Blacks will feel they cant share because whites just come up with racial biased and start getting defensive.

Why is it we cant have these discussion and try to learn to actively listen while also accepting some responsibilty for why shit is the way it is?

TLDR: We cant openly discuss race for fear of being called racist or without one side getting defensive and shutting down open dialogue.