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All your life you've tried to be a "Good" Brown Girl. You've lived by your faith. You've respected your traditions. You've tried to meet the expectations of your family. You've driven yourself to be what they say you should be. To be someone they are proud of.
And what have you received in exchange? Boredom. Repression. Disappointment. An unfulfilling life. Tormented by a growing curiosity. At first it was a just a flicker. Then a day-dream. Then a fantasy. Now it is an obsession. Distracting you from your studies. Forcing your mind to wander during family dinner. Everyone notices. They ask you why you seem so far off, so distant. But you can't tell them. Not only wouldn't they understand, they'd feel hurt. Betrayed. Angry. So you've keep your secret. You've remain unsatisfied. To keep them happy. Because you've been too afraid to admit what you are and what you need.
But now you can no longer repress yourself, your inner nature. You have to let it out, become what you really are. You've accepted what your purpose is. At first it was embarrassing to admit it to yourself, but you've moved past that. Because you know. Because you've realized it will make you happy, leave you satisfied for the first time, make you feel alive, whole...
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- 2 months ago
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