So let me preface this by saying this Is going to be a long story and I apologize in advance for the content within (Warning contains domestic violence, child abuse, drug use, and honestly a lot of other sad stuff) (Too long didn't read at the bottom)

My parents on the surface seemed like good parents and it's from rose colored glasses I've seen them for most of my life. It wasn't until events as of recently I started to sit back and really think about everything that's occured in the past 28 years of what seems like an entirely pointless existence. My parents were always quick to anger whether it was with me or my 4 siblings for reasons I won't get into my 2 eldest sisters were taken from my parents by my grandmother on my mom's side and weren't reunited with us until they were 13, and 14 respectively. That becomes an important detail later. My earliest memory of my father was him drunk sitting on the couch with myself, along with my older brother and sister he looked at my brother and told him he was never going to amount to anything more than a ditch digger, my sister was told she'd either be a prostitute,or stripper, and myself I was lucky enough to be deemed a future garbage man. He was quick with corporal punishment for anything deemed to be disobedient according to himself and his Jesus. I can remember him and my mom arguing over his gambling issues, once "losing his entire check in his workplace". Because of this I remember having sleep for dinner on more than one occasion. It got worse the older we all got after the passing of his father his drinking became far more severe, and the abuse became rampant. The one who got it the worst of all of us was my eldest brother. When he was in the third grade I had multiple memories of him sitting at the dinner table with my father doing his homework and whenever he'd get an answer wrong my father would slap him around repeatedly until he got all the anger out, and this was repeated with each problem until my brother's homework was completed. My mother would sit by and allow this to happen because well the 90s with southern Baptist parents. A little further ahead when both of my mother's parents passed away and my two eldest sisters came to live with us things became tense beyond any reason. My mother began to show extreme favor to them over the other three kids living in the house because of years of separation. They would emotionally manipulate my mother to get whatever they wanted saying with each occurrence well you were never there for us, making her feel incredibly guilty each time. With two more months to feed on a single salary my dad became angrier and more abusive verbally, and physically. Things were incredibly tense between all the siblings and because of this groups were formed with the four older siblings and I was pretty much left to the side ( such is life) a fight broke out between my older sister and brother where he broke a chair over her back (WWF was a big thing in our house) and because of this my brother thought it appropriate to spank my brother across his back with a studded belt which left extreme welts and bruises for around a month after that my oldest sister and I started to become close this is when I began to get sexually abused by her. This lasted from the time I was 6 until I was 10 and she was 17. When I told my mother police didn't get involved my mom beat her senseless and blackened her eye. Threatening more extreme violence if she didn't lie about the bruises to her teachers. It was around the time my oldest sister was getting ready to graduate highschool, that my parents had an argument that turned extremely physical where they beat the heck out of each other over actions my oldest sister did that upset them both. During this fight all of us kids were screaming and crying for them to stop to no avail, and when they both screamed a magic sentence that's been uttered more times in that house than Jesus loves you which is "I WANT A DIVORCE" which is around the time they told all the kids to pack a bag and pick a parent to live with, and for days after the fight both parents would be extremely cold to the children that didn't side with them and choose to go live with them even though no separation had actually happened. Things were extremely tense for the following months with two more fights of a similar nature taking place. Fast-forward to my teen years both oldest sisters and my only and escaped from that house and it was myself and my sister who is two years older than me left in that home. My dad had quit drinking for sometime at this point and was still physically abusive when the mood struck him to be so. There was a time when my mom and sister were arguing over her friend being able to stay the night my mom got really crappy and mean to my sister, and my sister rightfully so told her to stop being a witch. Unfortunately for her my dad heard her yanked her down by her hair, drug her down to her room beating her face in the entire way until he threw her in there threatening she'd get it worse if she came out. When she finally had enough and moved out he turned his abuse to me I had been working really hard and saved up money for an ipod nano (I'm old I know) and was doing something my father deemed unacceptable to which he threatened to take my iPod I way. I had the audacity to say he didn't have power over something he didn't buy, because of this he punched me in the face,and while I was on the floor curled up he kicked me in my ribs twice. Luckily my mom was there to watch it happen and do nothing.. well fast forward to when I graduate high school and all is well or so I think I get my first job at a fast food restaurant and start I was beyond miserable there and left shortly after I started I was so afraid of my father I moved cities to live with my then girlfriend and her parents to escape the consequences of what he'd see as a failure....

Intermission: I'm sorry if this story seems jammed together I'm trying to give a detailed background to help better the advice I'm asking.

Fast-forward to when I was about 25 after a 3 battling three years of addiction to various, and copious amounts of drugs from 18-23 winding up in legal trouble that landed me in prison serving my time and getting out I was living with my then girlfriend I was with since 22 and we had one son that she had from a previous relationship that I adopted to be my son as well. We were visiting my parents after my release from prison, well an argument broke out between my parents which lead to my dad assaulting my mother who had up to this point had 2 heart attacks and I was freaking livid I got in my father's face and told him if he ever laid his hands on my mom again I'd unalive him where he stood my then girlfriend being the amazing human she is already had my son,nieces,and nephews safely tucked away in the garage with her to protect them from the shit I seen as a kid.

Fast forward again now at 27-28 which is the present after another son and me working as an over the road trucker the mother of my children and I ended our relationship amicably and co parent our boys with love, pride, and passion . Shortly after this I met the woman I now call my fiancee, and we have a new baby girl together and she and my boys are the pride of my life and are why I work so hard to keep them away from the demons of my past so they don't have to live the life I did growing up. My parents who have grown slightly since then ( or so I believed) come to the house my fiancee and I have together. Immediately the first night I went to work with them here my mother asked my fiancee not to breastfeed our daughter downstairs because it makes my dad uncomfortable. After that my mother ignores my fiancee and my daughter pretty much the entire time they're here ( they left after two days) my father knowing full well her and I are agnostic atheists tried shoving Jesus down her throat she shut him down hard btw. And the weirdest part of all is my dad walked around MY house around my fiancee even though this was his second time meeting her... Wtf. After they left I noticed myself feeling the way I did much through my entire childhood and it sent me in a small downard spiral mentally and I'm finding it hard to cope I've been toying with the idea of cutting them out of my life along with my siblings who defend them endlessly because they're getting older and because "well who knows how much time they have left" please someone help me sort out this crazy ass mess

TL;DR Life is crazy as heck