Hi Reddit,

Today's my birthday. I've deferred the celebrating until the end of week because today's a holiday, and I am at work. It is dead, which is why I'm on Reddit.

To bring you up to speed: the past 5 years have been bad for birthdays. With events ranging from a ceiling falling on me, to my relationship crumbling (it was devastating but needed)

I'm still looking for birthday plans. I had a few conversations, a few kind of trailed off. I had made plans, but there was a date mix up, so plans were cancelled.

I'm still on the hunt for birthday festivities.

Ideally, I would like to do some or all of the following things: Grab some butts, brunch, reciprocal oral sex, possibly cumming on someone, eat some cake, get some tacos, drink whiskey, maybe some cuddles & binge watching, go to the claw machine arcade. I'm open to suggestions if you have ideas.

I've got dinner plans Thursday (we're old friends, not the sexy kind, probable butt grabs, but nothing further). But I have the rest of the weekend to figure out.

Me? I'm 44* as of today. 5'8", bearded, chubby. Basically your standard, middle aged bearded bear like man. I like bourbon, look good in flannel. I also enjoy cooking, poorly playing video games, and making people coffee. I'm great at trivia. I'm childfree, complete with vasectomy, DDF, left wing, alcohol & 420 friendly (although I don't smoke it). Visually I look like a younger, chubbier Julian Schnabel, totally fine if you don't know who that is, I only know who he is because there was a giant painting of him that was on display near where I use to work and people thought it was me.

You? You would like to help me celebrate. For dating history, I don't have a set type, although I have a soft spot for short chubby women. The big thing, is you would like to help me celebrate my birthday, or if you don't believe in birthdays, you just want to have brunch & cheesecake and oral sex with a chubby bearded man in his mid-40s.

Maybe it's one off, maybe it becomes ongoing if it works out.

No terfs, no cops, no zionists (I will make exceptions if you are into degradation).

*yes, I was allegedly 42, 7 months ago. it was a typo and you can't edit titles, but it close enough that I just didn't care. Although I put an edit in earlier today to clarify.