Hello various unclean swine of Antartica (Montreal basically because it is so cold that my testicles retracted inside of me and I have fully formed post-freezing labias).

So this post this time, is very different.

Your typical refreshing dose of misogyny is this time much gentler, like pre-enema lubrication.

Assuming that some of you are well adjusted individuals (cough not cough), here is the gist of what I want.

Note, that I sincerely don't give a fuck about your desires. This is the me show baybee.

You come over, you use your naked body to warm up my now lifeless body due to this cold.

Once I unthaw and my knob can resuscitate due to feeling like I am in a cryogenic chamber, we can fool around and watch incredible movies.

What I am looking for:

1-Big tittles. I am willing to settle for mosquito bites if your obsequious/putrescent nature does inspire me.

2-Your vajine should be tighter than a bison's butthole.

3-If you are loose, use your mouth to make me forget you're a disgusting whore.

That's it.

It is super cold and I know I am coming off as super romantic, but for the love of poutine, have big tits.

If you're a boring twat, close your eyes and bend over.

I will make you believe in magic again and show you my moves (you'll basically be fucked worse than a porno whore in a gangbang movie).

I have a big peen, I am insensitive, and I am pure masculinity.

Hi Golden_Zeal, I am in a couple and my bf is cuck or something:

Answer: perfect

Hey Golden_zeal, I am a cougar milf and I cheat on my husband because that's the only way I can cum anymore.

Answer: drown me in your cougar juices slut

Hey Golden_zeal, I have a lot of body hair because I am making a statement that nobody legitimately gives a fuck about

Answer: As long as you don't have facial hair, it will be like a walk in the garden with long grass

Hey Golden_zeal, I am a hippy feminist Leftist and my pussy has pube dreds and I use juices and berries to make my pube hair shine and be super moist/soft

Answer: Great. Maybe one day I will find your hole

HEY golden_zeal, my bf/fiancee/husband left me and I am pregnant and need cock burrowed so deep in my pussy that I feel it in my soul and I am needy.

Answer: Give me some of your tit milk and I will be super charged to fuck your anxiety away.

Hey Golden Zeal, I think toxic masculinity is really hot and my pussy is really wet

Answer: i'll use your puss juice to lubricate my cock and sodomize you. You're welcome

Hey Golden_zeal, I really want to suck on your balls and lick your ass to fill the void my dad left behind

Answer: so dreamy

Inbox me for a satisfying and unique experience

I have my own place and I drive