I know that folks have been memeing about Ohio a lot lately, but I don't think it's as bad as people make it out to be. Granted, I'm from the deep south, so I guess anything is better than rock bottom. But the people are pretty nice, there's weather and seasons, and zero traffic. The food is so fucking heavy though, good lord. I gained like 10 pounds right after I moved here - so much meat, cheese, and beer.

I'll finish rambling in case I've caught anyone's attention.

6'0 tall, husky/dad bod, but I've been focused on losing that fucking CHEESE weight the last few months and I'm 15 pounds down, so hurray for that. I'm 33 and my father's son, so my hairline has been steadily fading away into the ether for the last few years. I keep my head buzzed/shaved. I usually keep a nice beard tho. Glasses, tattoos - imagine a homebody in his thirties who drives a sedan and likes Run the Jewels and video games and that's about 90% me. Oh, and I got snipped in 2022 because of America. So yeah, not interested in having kids.

As for what I'm looking for, it's someone I'm attracted to. I know that sounds dumb and vague, but I'm being serious. I feel like it's been a long time since I've seen that special combo of looks and personality that makes me sweat. I'm real picky about people, especially when it comes to intimacy and romantic relationships. So yeah, here's what I like: kindness, patience, folks who can laugh at anything and are easy going, cat lovers, and self awareness. Readers, horror movie watchers, huge dorks who belly laugh at the dumbest stuff.

I cannot stand being rude for no reason - that's my number one button. Most southerners will say they're Christian, but they actually either worship college football or politeness. I really dislike arrogance. I'm also not a fan of speaking without thinking.

Physically, I like a bit of a size difference, so I'm very attracted to shorter/slimmer women. I also love curves, but I don't find obesity attractive. Yes, I know that's hypocritical since I'm a big boy and life would be a lot easier if I were attracted to bigger women, but I'm just not programmed that way. I like a nice butt, well done tattoos, shorter hair, usually dark or red. And nose piercings, good lord, thank you for nose piercings. Am I painting a picture here? Can you tell I graduated high school in 2007 and was super into Asking Alexandria?

I don't want to put a label on what I'm looking for. Yeah, I know I'm being vague again, but I don't want restrict myself in that way. I understand if that's a turn off to some people. But saying I'm open to anything is prolly the most honest way of putting it; I've only met a handful of people here so far, and I wanna meet more. If I find that special vibe, then I'll be more than happy to see what happens. So if you're in Columbus and this post peaked your interest, then let's go get a hotdog or a beer or something and talk about board games, cats, and our favorite dumb movies we found after scrolling for 15 minutes on Amazon Prime Video. If you're a bot, feel free to send me a message about your totally legit snapchat; I promise I'll sub, for sure.