(So I wanted to post this last night but well let's just say that I've posting too frequently (one guy suggested I was desperate, I was like maybe), so couldn't. I didn't want to change what I wrote because well that would mean changing what I feel).

Hi there,

So it's 23:26PM here, I'm semi-sleepy but I'm just either over thinking or not able to sleep peacefully.

I think I'm going to go in a rant mode now, I've never done this and I don't even know if this is the right place for this but I think sometimes you just can't act anymore

I'm a 27 year old man, I like most people in India, have been told that you need to study well, get a job and everything would be set. This is absolutely not a new story, so if you think it's a cliche, it most likely is and you can feel free to stop reading here.

But here's the thing, I did that, I did the hard work, I got a job but I'm not yet happy?

The last time I slept peacefully without worrying about tomorrow was six years ago, when I actually got this job in college and I thought I could solve everything for my family. I think I did well for all these years but why is being happy so difficult?

The thing is, if I was depressed probably that would have been easier, if I wish could just tell I'm not okay, but on paper, I am. I don't have anything to complain yet all I think is, I should have done better, I could have been better.

So here's the plot, I don't know where I'm going, but I just goddamn wish that someone stops and holds my hand.

I've never been in a relationship, I've loved though, with all my heart, I'm scared and reserved but I just want to experience this, I want to be okay, will I be? I want to be with someone real, I don't want to be hidden, I don't want to be a secret, I don't want to be just a guy..

Taking my chance, A