So a little context behind this post I've noticed an incredibly high number of scam posts recently and it really sucks and grinds my gears cause these pieces of shit aren't just going after any victims they know some of us are incredibly lonely and prey on our vulnerability.

Sadly here in Australia compared to all other nations I've lived in, due to the sheer size of the continent and lack of people, it gets really really bad and as social creatures we're bound to look for some form of a connection or bond to escape this dreadful feeling of lonely emptiness when you're back home from work and the long quiet except for your own words and thoughts seeps back in.

I wasn't always like this, I love going out, I love exploring new places and trying new things and even though it still is the case truth is since I've moved here I can all but say I have only 3 friends in this country other than a few school mates who moved here but live in other cities. I was your regular run of the mill guy, I liked working out, I liked to go to gigs, raves and clubs, I liked to play video games and board games with my mates , grab beers at a bar , jump around spots and just enjoy life but that all changed.

I had an accident that injured my spine and left me in a state of recovery and physio for three years, over that period I watched as the physique I so prided myself for fade into nothing while I put on A LOT weight, I saw how my facial structure changed and went from a sharp defined aesthetic to what my friends lovingly refer to as the "bloat lord", my girlfriend at the time who I thought I would have spent the rest of my life and raised a family with left me while I was in this down and out state, I don't blame her, I was no longer the man she fell in love with - physically at least, and truth is I could never be again because no matter how well I've recovered now I'll probably never be at 100% like I was when younger. Coupled with the diminishing features I noticed how the world treated me differently. It's really shitty to say this, but truth is in my personal experience people are soooo much kinder and willing to aid you and in fact go out of their way to aid you when you're good looking. I saw these very people change how they perceived me, how they behaved with me and in general how the world itself responded to me. All of this coupled with the fact that I had just been dumped by what I thought was the love of my life really took a toll on my self confidence and self worth.

So I went from the guy surrounded by friends and people who wanted to always be around him to the guy who was just a fat unappealing slob that was only tolerable because I wasn't dirt poor and could afford to go out, so I was a nice filler when others dropped out of the plan feelssodamngood.jpg to be the backup.

The worst part of all of this is Ive always lived my life with principal I used to hate seeing guys that looked like the way I do now sitting alone at events so I'd always go out of my way to talk to them and introduce them to others so they could join in on the fun. I never even did wrong by the women I was with because I was raised to treat the women I dated how I would like a man to treat my own mother and sister. I was faithful always, monogamous and never even hooked up with a woman unless I was ready to commit into a relationship and at the end of all of it turns out I needed to learn a few more lessons in life so karma taught me and how... I never expected a return and still don't when I do something for someone because I do what I can purely for the sake of it being the right thing to do but I guess the world isn't like that and you'd think this would have made me cautious enough but it didn't.

I came to Australia leaving behind everything and everyone I had ever known in search of a new start with an incredibly focused drive and will to achieve something significantly substantial, at least enough to provide for the people I cared about in every capacity.

I immediately fell in love with this country, the world just looks a little more beautiful here than elsewhere. There's something miraculous about the sky here in Australia it's kind of mesmerising. The weather was perfect and the work culture was nice !

I got a really good job with a very well known firm globally, started working on my career also managed to get into a post doctoral program to further accentuate my earning potential and to generally learn cause I am a bit of a nerd and so I like reading and learning new things. I started meeting a lot of people due to the nature of my job but these were all colleagues and clients and sure office parties are fun but in my line of work I'm a bit of an outlier, most people are incredibly good looking as well and it's all part of the ensemble in this corporate circle. You look good , dress good , talk good and do good work. I guess I hit three out of those metrics which is why I got selected but it definitely wasn't the looks that's for sure 🤣 I like to joke that maybe I fulfilled some cultural diversity quota or something but it probably was the case 🤣🤣

Regardless after everything was said and done, it was always just me getting home alone as usual since I came and then began my solo routine of getting prepped for the next day.

My life went from being surrounded by my friends and family and fighting to manage time due to my numerous plans with friends to barely knowing anyone around me left with no one to talk to or visit or see.

I engrossed myself in work to focus on what I needed to do for the people that mattered, and then one day I came across Reddit. Finally I could be myself right on this anonymous platform voice who I was and find my people or at least find someone I could spend my time with, go see a movie, grab a bite , take a walk along the beach with and maybe adopt a puppy with eventually as well. I thought maybe after all this time finally maybe just maybe I'd find someone that would like who I am here and no longer feel the long quiet emptiness when I was home alone at the end of the day.

So I made a few posts, had a few chats but nothing really materialised until one day I see this post, this post seems relatively timid the girls just looking for someone to be friends with and see how it goes from there, her profiles following some relationship forums and she has some posts about loving God and being grateful. Seems about alright, pretty normal nothing out of the blue, so I shoot my shot and send a DM.

Lo and behold I get a reply, we start talking and it's going well things are nice we're chatting fairly regularly and for the first time in years, when I'm in the house alone , I don't feel alone ! I feel like I have someone there , someone to talk to , someone I can share my day with.

So eventually we progress onto Snapchat and she sends me a real snap of herself, and my god she was beautiful (immediate red flag - guys who look the way I do now don't get people like this even if I may have a good job and career I'd have to have been a top 1% earner for even having a chance to tak to a beautiful woman like that ). We talk I snap her back she snaps back and there's back forth, we talk for a few more days discuss meeting that weekend then one day I get snap with her in her towel, naturally me being a lonely fucking loser for the past 4 years doesn't stop to think and gets excited.

One thing led to the other, next thing I'm added to a group on my Instagram with all my contacts by this girls Instagram profile (this profile was incredibly detailed it had posts of her trailing back 4 years ! Hence I had added her after two weeks of talking) and then I get a Snapchat message from her and it's screenshots of my dick and face and the texts we've been sharing and that when I get a call from her snap.

I answer and it's what I'm assuming front the accent an African man demanding money or he will expose me.

My life which I had worked so hard to rebuild at this point was now about to come crashing down on me, I was about to lose everything. After an incredibly harrowing few hours I managed to pay off the person for 250$ USD in Bitcoin and then blocked and ignored them. But that didn't stop them, they came back two days later and threatened to post my pics on the Instagram group. Finally at my wit's end on the verge of being ready to either end my life or take a stand I decided to give no fucks anymore and went on the offensive.

I immediately went onto the Instagram group and posted telling everyone what had happened, that I had been catfished and extorted and was being extorted further and would not pay the ransom and that this man was going to post lewd photos of me.

The scammer realised they no longer had power over me and they deleted the group and blocked me in return.

Days past but I couldn't get this disgusting feeling out of myself. I felt disgusted with what had happened and more importantly with myself.

I looked at myself in the mirror and could only think "what a fucking loser, you're so alone and deprived of human connection you feel for an online scam even after being well versed in these situations"

That's all there was when I saw myself and to a degree that's all there is now.

I am 32 years old, I have a successful career , good education but I am fat and alone.

And even though I may be alone at least I am not being scammed.

I am not being extorted and that's enough for me.

I have found solace in the fact that I will probably be alone but also that I will work harder and provide even better for my siblings and mother for I have nothing else to care for.

I am alone but I'm not being extorted and questioning my self worth.

I may not be happy but I'm definitely not sad.

Find your solace my friends and beware of the scammers please.

I know it's tough it really is but it's better this way than otherwise...