Long term lonely lover

(Long post warning):

This is a very weird and wrong way to do this, but I never do anything normal or right.

I, uh, have been alone my whole life, and I’m very good at handling myself and taking care of me. However, since I’ve moved to Portland I’ve been STRUGGLING. I can barely feed myself some days. I’ve been going through a major depressive episode, and it’s made me very lonely. I’ve had a few Reddit hookups, hoping that it would ease something in me. But that just made me feel worse to be honest. So what I’m asking for is a long term lover. I want someone to hang out with, and encourages me. Someone who’ll I’ll want around me, and in my space- and that want alone will make me want to clean. Someone who I can feed, and someone who’ll sometimes remind me to eat. I need someone who can take care of me. Not like a parent, but like a friend. By no means am I looking for a maid or an ATM. I’m financially set. I’m just looking for a person to grill burgers and paint in the park with, and maybe someone to hold when the weather starts to turn.

I’ve never been good at dating apps or online anything. And it’s hard finding people who actually interest me at bars. and I don’t know how to find people in this town. ALSO I KNOW THERE ARE OTHER BI/QUEER/LESBIANS here but WHERE DO I FIND YALL?

IDKIDKIDK. It’s hard to be a woman of color looking for a person I relate to here. I’m 22 F looking for someone NB or F as well. I’m a line cook, which I mostly love. I love cartoons-adventure time is my favorite, but I have a lot of favorites. I’m currently watching one piece for the first time. I love tea, thrifting, and insanely long walks. I want to explore the wilds or Oregon way more and camp out under the stars. Sitting across the room from each other doing two separate activities is a date to me. Would like to learn a lot of new things with someone. Pottery, jewelry making, sword fighting, carpentry, and looming are the next things I want to learn. If you’re willing to move to a commune you’re my type of person.

Alright that enough from me, but if you read all that and it touched your blood pumping machine you should hmu idk.