By serious I mean: Exclusive/monogamous, we prioritize each other, but we're not dependent on each other. We make efforts to keep the romantic spark going. We treat each other with respect and kindness. We're learning/curious about each other and grow together. We support and challenge each other in empathetic ways.

The optimal dynamic would be that of friends-to-lovers.

I'm not necessarily looking to get married or have kids, but if the conditions were right, maybe! I've always been on the fence about kids but currently I enjoy being an auntie and have always loved kids. I could see myself never having kids and not regretting it, or having my own child later on if it made sense.

I'm gonna get the big stuff out of the way. Please refer to my post when chatting so that I don't have to repeat myself. This is gonna be a long, but informationally-valuable post.

• About me:

5'3", a little chubby but average weight and have lost some decent weight so far this year, on track for my fitness goals

Shaved head (don't ask me why, please, it's not important, and if you care this isn't going to work out between us)

Tattoos

Happy to send pics if you send one first.

I am technically Asexual (demisexual). I have a high sex drive and very much enjoy sex, but the conditions have to be right to do that with someone else. I'm open to discussing sexuality and flirting if we seem compatible. I am well-versed in kink and open to some of it, tho I could go my whole life without it at this point.

Pansexual/bisexual, whichever makes more sense to you.

My character: people I've chatted with, and those in my life, would say that I'm easy to talk to, kind, honest, communicative, intelligent, perhaps a bit boring and serious, a bit of a homebody, funny, understanding, and strong on my boundaries. I'd also say I'm a bit of a risk-taker where it counts. I'm slightly spiritual but grounded in scientific reality (agnostic atheist). I have ADHD so I tend to rotate my interests, I'm a night owl type, among other traits.

Hobbies: reading (mostly nonfiction), indoor workouts, gaming (switch), cuddling my kitten, listening to podcasts

Semi-frequent Hobbies: cooking, baking, rock collecting & polishing, thrifting, singing/dancing, drawing, news/politics

Occasional hobbies: board games, TV shows & movies including anime, music concerts, foreign languages, writing

I'm currently between jobs (I spent covid finishing my psychology degree) and recently moved back to the city to get back to work. My goals are to enter the mental health field and eventually begin grad school, possibly became a therapist.

I smoke weed socially with others and I rarely drink alcohol.

• What I'm looking for:

I'm looking for a bit of a unicorn 🦄 here but I also know that there's a person out there for me. Reddit is my way of entertaining that for me currently, as I'm not a huge fan of the apps.

I don't care about height, or financial status so long as you have goals and meet them. I do prefer an educated individual but a certain level of skill and experience is comparable.

I do care about personal appearance to some extent. Someone who cleans up well and is balanced in mindfulness towards diet/exercise. Someone who cares about their health, skin, teeth, and long-term quality of life. I'm here for a long time & a good time, and you should be too.

I don't mind long distance but the gap must be closed with some sort of timeline once we reach the serious phase. I'd rather take things slow though so this isn't an immediate priority.

I'm not looking for someone to share their hobbies with me necessarily, and hopefully you aren't either. Some common ground is nice but I'd rather prioritize shared goals and values.

Traits that appeal to me: intelligent & curious, well-rounded, creative, kind/generous, great communication, good with pets/animals, goal-driven, honest, takes good care of themselves, low levels of neuroticism, good at handling the conflicts of every day, enjoys the little things, positive/upbeat but can discuss serious issues

Absolute dealbreakers: Ongoing addictions and addictive behaviors. Lack of emotional availability (inconsistent behavior). Using me to fill the void of not having a life that satisfies you. High levels of insecurity. Major struggles with vulnerability and openness. Untreated mental health issues. Strong people-pleasing tendencies. Doesn't floss & brush after every meal. Lack of inherent motivation to make and meet goals. Lovebombing behaviors.

In order to get a response from me: (And yes, I respond to every DM that looks like this eventually. I will even check your account to see if the following information is already available somewhere else.)

Please include your age, gender, location, some hobbies/interests, and something you're looking forward to. Feel free to include a face pic and I'll return the favor.

I use discord, Kik, and snap (tho I hate it atp tbh) if you don't prefer reddit, so feel free to give me a handle.

I like to chat a decent amount before moving to voice chat, but happy to do so when it feels right.