TLDR: Put me out of my misery by sitting on my face....please.
Who knew trying to find an attractive woman to eat out would be so hard???
It's come to the point where I've run out of women to swipe on Tinder because it's either barf ugly couples looking for "unicorns" or 19 year olds bragging about being "mentally ill"(when did that become a trend....?).
Here are some cold hard American facts:
-I am not a serial killer (too much hard work)
-I am moderately attractive (the construction guys around my job say I'm a fan favorite!!!)
-I live alone and prefer to host (so no one can hear your screams....of pleasure)
-I'm in the North Plano/Frisco area so you need to be down to travel (not my fault this God forsaken state is so damn big)
-I have a strapless strap on named Barney (that I would like to use on someone other than myself)
Hard Pills to Swallow:
-I'm not interested in men...at all, and that includes your significant other watching/participating
-You will have to social media verify via Instagram. If that makes you uncomfortable do not message me
-If you're not local to the DFW I'm not interested, I don't care how "often" you visit
Ride Requirements:
-Must be a woman -Prefer ages 20-35 unless you look like Katheryn Hahn from that period of time she was on Parks&Rec (weird taste...I know) -Bonus points if you have an innie
***I have a phenomenal referral program if you put me in touch with a lovely face sitter and we have a great time ❤️
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- 3 years ago
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