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I’m the nurturing type. You know, the kind that is always there for anybody who needs it even if they don’t want to hear the advice they’re going to be given. I’m the one who bankrolls relationships because I shoot under what I’m capable of getting due to fear of rejection or some other insecure bullshit that my mind can’t wrap around. I’m the one who is sick and disabled and has nobody there for me, but constantly tries to extend myself outwards because I feel like I’m just drowning in loneliness when all I want is to love and be loved in return with no restrictions, but life just doesn’t seem to turn out that way.
So, who am I? I’m a 25 year old, currently unemployed (but endlessly looking), student for American Sign Language interpreting. I’d like to go medical as my original major was in the medical field. I have mental illnesses that technically disable me, but I still try to be the best that I can be. I recently started experimenting in the kitchen again. I go on hikes a lot. I have a service dog in training named Odin. I love mythology. I can talk hours about a lot of topics. I still, to this day, do not know why I can’t seem to maintain relationships other than the fact that some days, I can be moody and bitchy, but I try to stay away from people on those days. I’m only slightly overweight but down 70 lbs now.
I feel like I’m finally just broken.
If you’re out there, I promise to give you everything I have, just help me. Nurture me. Save me from my own mind. From loneliness. From myself. I don’t know.
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