I've thought about this a lot and I think my best chance is to just be brutally honest with what's been going on with me and what I'm looking for. The past three years or so have been quite harrowing for me—I went through some severe depression that started around the pandemic and went through a lot of different treatments and medications, I had a family member and a friend of mine pass, and I've been out of work because of these things (although I have been able to sustain myself off disability and savings). However, I finally found a medication that is working for me, and I am soon starting a temporary job while I take online courses to get the rust off of my programming skills so I can go back to being a software engineer. I'm also still working on healthy habits and I'm in the middle of losing some weight I have gained from all of this (partially from medication side-effects, partially bad habits). But overall, I feel pretty good and I think I have a lot to offer as a person and partner if you're willing to be patient with all of the aforementioned things. Perhaps most importantly, I don't feel like I need someone to help me through all of this. I've got it—I just want someone to love and support me while I do it :)

Anyway, let me tell you more about myself just as a person! I'm very kind-hearted and empathetic, partially due to everything I've been through and all the people I've met. When someone is going through something I just want to help them and give them a hug. I tend to be very open, and I won't hesitate to tell someone what I like about them, because we just don't get to hear that much, you know? Especially if I meet someone who is genuine, kind, and humble. I have a lot of love to give and I'm a very affectionate and supportive partner. I also have this goofy and weird side that doesn't come out unless with my family or further into a relationship with someone. It just involves a lot of nonsense phrases, references, and dad jokes. But I don't know, I think it's fun for the right person lol. Speaking of family, I have a big family of 8 siblings and I'm a twin. We are all close but as time has gone on we naturally don't spend as much time with each other as we used to. But I love them a lot and we have our own lexicon of inside jokes and references (mostly SpongeBob and super old internet videos).

My interests are kind of the typical nerdy stuff. Music, games, and a little bit of anime and movies. I can be really picky about all of those, but at the same time I'm really passionate about my favorites and could go on and on about them. Especially when it comes to music, I played sax for 8 years and I picked up bass guitar somewhat recently but stopped playing after that family member died. I would like to get back into learning it though, I just have to get past being hard on myself for forgetting things. But even with listening to music, there are always little things that I will pick out and get attached to musically, and there are a lot of songs in which the lyrics really hit home. Music has definitely helped me through some tough times. I love playing video games though and it would be fun to have someone to play some stuff together with. For two-player stuff I like farming games especially but I'm willing to play most things. I've also played a lot of co-op horde-type games, like Left 4 Dead or Deep Rock Galactic. I'm really into Warhammer 40k: Darktide right now. For single-player, I play a lot of roguelites and deckbuilders.

As far as looks go, I'm 6'3" and 250 lbs (at the moment). I have medium-length, thick brown hair that is starting to go gray, glasses, and 4 piercings on each ear. No tattoos though. Clean shaven and not very hairy in general. Definitely willing to exchange pictures, of course. And get on a voice-call after getting to know each other a little bit but still pretty soonish.

What am I looking for? Obviously someone who will be patient as I said earlier, but also someone who loves making jokes and just bantering. Someone who is genuine and caring. And obviously if you are going through your own stuff right now I understand, but I also want someone similar to me who is self-sufficient in making progress, where being a relationship would be nice but it's not needed. Also, I'm not a very political person, and I generally don't care where you lean as long as it isn't extreme. I'm also non-religious but I don't mind spirituality. Again, as long as it's not extreme. Lastly, I have no kids and I'm fairly certain I don't want any. But yeah, if you made it this far I would love to hear from you!