Heya, I'm a 27 year old dude from FL!

I've posted on here (and other subs) a couple times but typically any reply I get it's someone who's self-serving or just wants to talk TO someone and not WITH someone. Either just going "hi" and saying not much else, or just telling me one thing about themselves in detail then not really listening to the back and forth. I guess it's a lot like being in a relationship who doesn't see a relationship as a partnership, but as some sort of one-way street.

Anyway! About me! I was socially isolated from a young age by an abusive and mentally ill parent. There were a lot of problems this caused me, I never got a (formal) education past 2nd grade, having to teach myself everything I know, furthermore, I was kept completely isolated from anyone else and as such the only friends I have are parasocial friendships with people online that I mostly socialize with when I play videogames with them. There's nothing wrong with that! I do value them a lot, but they never want to talk about anything serious or deep. Don't get me wrong, I love making dumb, bathroom humor, or even offensive jokes but sometimes I wish I had friends who were intelligent and wanted to talk more deeply about things or talk on an emotional level.

I plan on studying this year to become a therapist to help others, and leverage my first hand experience of experiencing abuse to forge an understanding and help me relate to and better help people who are trying to improve their lives too, and overcome those traumas. I'm really passionate about helping others, it's all I want to do. I'm on a big self improvement grind right now and part of that is finally seeing myself worth of friendship. And I guess that's why I"m posting.

I'm also very much into older women from things that transpired in my chlidhood.

If you'd like to talk or think we'd make good friends, please don't hesitate to reach out and message me! :)