Look, I am going to level with you, this is a repost of a repost because I am once again going to be stuck on a night shift that doesn't end until about 6am and I will be scraping the barrel trying to survive once more. I've had a better week this week in that I haven't been in any fist fights with the upper echelon of management and the internal screaming is at white noise levels of subtle. Alas, I still consider that life of crime (I am closer to it every day) and I am honestly just trying to survive this charade we call life (I'm treading water, release the life raft or the sharks with lasers, your choice.)

If there is anyone out there also feeling like their cheeks have been clapped against their will and you're looking for some company then please reach out. I am here to talk, I feel like a chat, boredom may have my body but not my soul (yet). I feel restless and whilst I am not at work yet I van already tell it's going to be slower than a glue covered snail trying to go uphill.

I'm into a wide variery of topics and hobbies, I can milk a cow, make large dick shaped objects out of clay, bake cakes that'll make your grandmother sip tea and wish she was 40 years younger. Hell there's not much I am not willing to discuss or talk about tbh. You wanna talk politics? You wanna talk about midget wrestling? You wanna talk about that weird lump?

Tell me what you have been watching, or talk to me about your arch nemesis and let's plan their early retirement... I need a friend, or a lover, or a partner in crime, or a warlord that deals in cookies and unfathomably large gummy bears that would almost certainly destroy anyone they fell on.

All I offer is banter and quality, if your idea of quality is a rusty bucket filled to the brim with terrible puns and mildly inappropriate innuendos that will make you sinfully soggy. Short term, long term, whatever, my expectations are low and my time is somehow not moving forward. I am all yours if ya want it and/or eternity if indeed this clock is not moving and I have landed myself in some sort of fucked up groundhog day purgatory.

Anyway, someone out there save me from myself tonight, please. I will owe you at least 3 of these skittles that I am using to fuel my insane crusade into the depths of night shift.