Look, I am going to level with you, I am stuck on a night shift that doesn't end until about 6am and I am scraping the barrel trying to survive this one. I've had one of those rough, awful, butt hurting weeks where you really start considering that life of crime and I am honestly just trying to survive this charade we call life.

If there is anyone out there also feeling like their cheeks have been clapped against their will this week and looking for some company then please reach out. I am here to talk, I feel like a chat, boredom may have my body but not my soul. I feel restless and work is slower than a glue covered snail trying to go uphill.

I'm into a wide variery of topics and hobbies, I can milk a cow, make large dick shaped objects out of clay, bake cakes that'll make your grandmother sip tea and wish she was 40 years younger. Hell there's not much I am not willing to discuss or talk about tbh. You wanna talk politics? You wanna talk about midget wreslting? You wanna talk about that weird lump?

Tell me what you have been watching, or talk to me about your arch nemesis and let's plan their early retirement... I need a friend, or a lover, or a partner in crime, or a warlord that deals in cookies and unfathomably large gummy bears that would almost certainly destroy anyone they fell on.

All I offer is banter and quality, if your idea of quality is a rusty bucket. Short term, long term, whatever, my expectations are low, my time is somehow not moving forward and I am all yours for the next few hours if ya want it, and/or eternity if indeed this clock is not moving and I have landed myself in some sort of fucked up groundhog day purgatory.

Anyway, someone out there save me from myself tonight, please.