So I'm almost to the 23 day mark of no smoking. Don't really have many cravings. I quit on Memorial Day this year 100% cold turkey, no aids or vapes. Physically, I feel excellent and haven't touched my inhaler in almost 2 weeks. Mentally though....

There is a pinned post about depression and low self esteem as side effects to quitting smoking. From what I understand, it's basically because the chemicals in cigarettes relieve the anxiety and stress that cause depression. Let me tell you, it is totally true. I have always struggled with low self esteem since I was a kid. High school was a real struggle. I've heard the bullshit "beauty is on the inside" line for years. I hate the way I look, I'm ugly and fat. I used to have suicidal thoughts back then, and I've had some this time but nowhere near as serious. I should be happy given that I have a good life and lots going for me. But the fact that my low self esteem has also cost me a lot of missed opportunities in my life and now I'm full of regret on top of everything else. And the regret part is probably the biggest feeling I've had since it hit me a few days ago. Never really had that serious of a feeling while I smoked.

So if you've fought with these issues in the past, be prepared when you quit smoking. Have a better support system or plan in place than me. Sorry for the rant, but I had to get it off my chest.