Hi everyone. So happy to be here and have found this community. I’m here to share my PLAN, my journey, be vulnerable, accountable and hopefully inspire others to do the same.

I’m 22 and have been taking Kratom for 1.5 years. At first it was to deal with some IBS pains, but then my addictive traits kicked in and I started chasing the dragon. HARD.

By month 6 I was taking extracts equivalent to 20-30gpd, and as of 1m ago it was easily up to 80gpd. Not a single day off.

I feel my body slowly falling apart. IBS flaring up. Eating insanely healthy but not healing. Ignoring the my blatant toxic relationship with the green sludge.

I told myself “I’m so exhausted after work, it helps me with social anxiety” “It’s helping me work extra hours in my very important role at the startup I helped build” “I’m renovating my entire house after work, I need the extra energy!”

Lies. Absolutely nothing is worth selling my body and my spirit to this fucking bullshit opiate. It was never sustainable. And I knew it from the day I started taking more than 1x a day.

Becoming more emotionless than ever, I found myself isolating for months, binging YouTube videos and nodding off at 7pm. Not being emotionally available for my soon to be fiancé because I couldn’t even feel my own fucking emotions.

Next thing I know I figure out my shes pregnant with my kid. WOW what a whirlwind of emotions that was. Trying to comfort her on 30 grams of Kratom? Yikes. The guilt I felt. We did not think we were ready for this. Especially me deep into this addiction.

That was when I knew I HAD to be done. Forever. If my parents taught me one thing it was that I was the most beautiful and impactful thing they ever did. And I WILL BE PRESENT FOR MY CHILD. NO MATTER WHAT.

I WILL BREAK THE GENERATIONAL ADDICTION. I WILL BREAK THE GENERATIONAL SELF DOUBT. THE FEELING OF NOT BEING ENOGH.

So it was time to take action.

The past 4 months I’ve: - successfully tapered to 20gpd, quit, and then relapsed 2 weeks later - gone 3 days CT 2 separate times

Unsuccessful so far. But Jan 10 2024 is the FUCKING DAY. It’s the FUCKING day I’m never ever ever taking opiates again.

I am so so confident. All Thanks to reading your beautiful stories here. Thanks to my consistency with workouts, meditation, eating healthy, sunlight on my skin. Thanks to the FIRE inside my soul that is burning bright once again. The one that wants to unconditionally love, the one that truly wants to provide value to this world.

I desire to truly love and care for every human, and remind them of the divine, loving people they were at birth and had forgotten.

And as you all have stated hundreds of times here. It all starts with loving yourself. So thank each and every one of you for helping me innerstand that.

To the ones who’ve made it through and told your tale: I have so much respect for you. To the ones who have the desire to quit: You can fucking do it. The amount of information here is incredible. Create your affirmations, stay busy, etc etc. You’ve got this.

Posting my written plan including my suppliment stack the comments for anyone interested