Trigger warning ⚠️

So I was S/A as a child starting about the age of 3 (or at least that’s as far back as I can actually recall anything).

I’m 35 now, & as of late I just want to shave my long hair off my head & crawl out of my skin for a while.

I have a therapist but Christmas is coming up so I don’t want to pressure her to schedule me for a meeting anytime until after the holidays are done.

I’m sure this is normal to feel this way but I’m just curious if anyone else just feels the same way.

Like I don’t want to be in this body anymore. I don’t want to be attached to having to take care of myself at all physically anymore. I want to cut off all of my hair (it’s falling out in clumps anyways as it is due to continued stress I assume) & I hate the health issues that come with my body. It would be so nice to unzip & step out of my skin & body for a while and just take a break / a breather.