I need your advice. A couple of months ago I met a girl (lets call her Sarah) who is also in a polyamorous relationship and we pretty much instantly started dating. At approximately the same time I started dating another girl (lets call her Anna) who up until this point didnt have any experience with polyamory but she told me that she was open about it.

A couple months later Im starting to realise that Im starting to catch really intense feelings for Anna. The same unfortunately is not true for Sarah but I really like her and want too keep meeting up with her, cuddling and kissing her but theres just not happening anything emotionally other than „i really care about this person and want her to be part of my life“. We really have much in common and had a great time together most of the time.

The last few weeks have been kinda rough as In started to feel bad for my feelings and we (Sarah and I) have been arguing a lot about stuff. I told her that Im not ready for a relationship yet and that theres some issues regarding lack of communication and our sexuality in particular.

Now I dont know what to do. Sarah and Anna have met for the first time this weekend and they seem to really like each other. Also, Anna told me in the past, that she likes the openness of polyamory and shes been mentioning that she probably wouldnt date me monogamously because she doesnt like the pressure of being the only person in my life, fulfilling all my needs, being responsible for making up more time for me etc.

Now Im stuck in this twisted clusterfuck - I feel bad for falling in love with Anna and not being able to give the same to Sarah. On the other hand I really enjoy my time with Sarah and dont want to cut ties with her. Also I fear of Anna not wanting to be with me anymore if the relationship between Sarah and me ends.

Furthermore there was a stupid situation this weekend where Sarah sent me a text message while all three of us were sitting at a restaurant where she asked for more of my time in a (in my opinion) accusatory way. This led to us arguing a bit in front of Anna which also makes me feel ashamed and fearful of losing Anna.