I (25 f) was in a cult growing up, and always had a crush on the pastor's kid. Nevaeh (24 mtf) came out to me as trans a couple months ago.

After that we did a lot of catching up and I found out she was in a red state that banned gender affirming care, lived with her fundamentalist family, and had a partner-- Pixie (20 mtf).

In a month me and my nesting partner Dick (29 M) made a plan for her to uhaul from the east coast to the west coast. Nevaeh says she's been with Pixie since January, lost her virginity to her, and can't leave her. They both have ASD.

I messaged Pixie to ease her worries about moving here, and from the start she was aggressively sexual towards me. I thought: fuck it, if it makes her more comfortable to move here, it's just sexting.

Through messaging Pixie I really liked her and could feel for her. She had a lot of trauma-- we both do--, was really insecure, and not that stable-- but how could you be in that environment? I really wanted to make her feel safe.

After the plans were set-- thats when the drama started. Pixie tries to fuck Nevaeh's cousin in front of her, making Nevaeh really uncomfortable. Pixie says she wants to live with Martha (their mutual partner) and Nevaeh's cousin in Colorado. Then Martha breaks up with Pixie and verbally abuses her. Pixie pressures me to buy her a car in another state-- that fails miserably.

I fix their resumes and set them up with job interviews for the first week they get here.

Then the two of them fly out here. Things get sexual the first day. Something that Pixie keeps doing is touching my genitals and my chest whenever she wants, randomly. This triggers me badly, but I mask up because I want to please her. After all that I notice her teeth are black and rotting, her breath smells, her gentials smell bad even after a shower.

We have sex, and the first thing she says is, "that was mid."

When I get sexual with Nevaeh, Pixie is always interupting the scene-- barging into the room and trying to talk to us.

Pixie constantly shits on everyone, shits on everything I like, is always complaining about the new state-- after awhile it really got to me. I asked if she wanted to go to therapy, and she vowed she'd never go again. This really eats at me because I'm convinced if people don't seek help for trauma, they are just going to continue it.

After the first week Pixie was obsessed with wanting to buy a bb gun to shoot fish and other invasive animals. My PTSD brain just kind of put the unwanted touching and then the torturing of animals into a category: Pixie was NOT safe anymore.

The whole household came outside. Pixie bought the BB guns, and started shooting lead into our yard-- which is a couple of feet from a protected woodland. Then she started talking about buying guns-- and I had a terrible flashback of when someone pointed a gun at my face at 11.

I started screaming, "NO GUNS, NO GUNS, NO GUNS." Over and over and over. After that we stayed away from each other for a couple of days. And I'm fine with guns, I'm very pro-gun. I'm an anarchist who thinks we need to be wary of the government. But my body just felt super unsafe and terrified of her having guns in the house.

We have 3 cats together, mine and Dick's 2 cats and their cat Max. Well one or two weeks later and my cat Taki is obsessed with Pixie's draw-strings on her favorite pjs. For a week I keep seeing Taki try to bat at the strings and it made me smile. One day, Taki tries to grab them and he accidentally clawed Pixie's thigh.

She then kicks Taki hard away from her.

I scream, "CAN YOU NOT DO THAT NEXT TIME, AND JUST TAKE A STEP BACK!"

Pixie wasn't even apologetic. She just says, "What am I supposed to do when he hurts me?"

And I scream, "NEXT TIME, I'M GOING TO BE VIOLENT." And I left and slammed the door. I then started getting really paranoid. How can I trust she won't kick my cat again? So I go to her room, take her pjs, and cut off the draw strings.

A couple weeks later, and I'm trying to get along. I buy Pixie a car with everything she needs for it. I have a terrible pain attack, and the whole time she's flirting with me through it and touches my boobs.

A day later Pixie has a girl over. She says she's gonna quit her job (that she just got), work with her, break up with Nevaeh (but still live here), and be Mono with this new girl. I was pissed, this was definitely the last straw for me.

The next day I'm going on a date with Nevaeh, im taking her to my favorite fancy restaurant, we both look cute and 10 minutes into the drive Nevaeh goes quiet and starts silently crying. I finish the drive and park near by, but she has completely gone nonverbal. I ask her a bunch of questions but all I can get out of her is that it's about Pixie. This really freaks me out.

I drive to go pick up Dick, and after that my brain can't take it anymore: I switch personalities (something I only do when I'm stressed). *My brother only went nonverbal when my stepdad SA'd him.

We go get drive through, go home, sleep it off.

Then next day I'm still extremely stressed. I think Nevaeh went nonverbal because of the break up. And Pixie brings her new Gf over, and kicks Nevaeh out of the room. I AM FUMING. I turn my music as loud as I can, and tell Dick I do not feel like a safe person at the moment. I scream, I do breathing exercises, I try to punch a pillow, but nothing is working. I'M SOO STRESSED.

Dick says Nevaeh and him want to go out. I put myself together, I get dressed, and by the time I'm out Nevaeh has gone nonverbal again. I lose it. I switch into 5 different personalities infront of them both-- which I've never done before.

"We" say that I don't wanna be around Pixie anymore and that I basically wanna do parallel poly as much as possible.

It's been a month and I still haven't been paid back for the car, I haven't talked to Nevaeh (she hasn't talked to me), and everyone says I'm the bad guy. That I'm making Pixie's life Hell-- even though my mental health has literally gone down the gutter.

I don't know what to do or how to navigate this-- Help.