Sigh. I've wanted a hot threesome again for 20 YEARS and it finally happened last night with my boyfriend and my friend newly-turned FWB. She's gorgeous, smart, sexy, and into me -- I'm not feeling insecure about being cared for or loved by these two (my bf and I have been together for almost a year, and poly from the start but separate, this is our first 3 way).

It was going sooo great, sensual and hot and wow and... oh, I guess she gives REALLY GOOD HEAD. I'd never heard the sounds coming from my bf like last night, and at first I was like, YAY this is his first double blow job and I felt so happy, and then I just felt inadequate.

We carried on, and things and so so good between her and I, and then at one point she gets on my bf's face and I'm riding him while making out with her and seriously it's like "OMG is this actually happening this is so fucking amazing!!"

And then I don't even know it's happening but I guess she starts gushing on him and he's going nuts. I didn't even know that was a "sex bucket list item" for him, I guess because I can't do that.

After everything we were cuddling and cooing and he just couldn't stop going off about how that was mind blowing incredible and it just hit home this feeling like apparently I suck at oral.

It really isn't jealousy I'm feeling, it's my own inadequacy. I was very turned on by seeing them together, and I loved the experience.

I just wish I could be basking in the afterglow this morning instead of feeling like I don't measure up.

Any suggestions or words of comfort to help me feel better?