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Is it common for people in the community to influence somebody to leave their partner if they're struggling with accepting poly?
If I had a close friend in a struggling relationship that was caused by an incompatibility with no hope of repair like one person wanting monogamy and one wanting polyamory, I'd be cautious in my approach. Im not a fan of telling people how to manage their relationships, but these also probably don't belong together so I'd support them in working through that decision. Why wouldn't I support someone I cared about?
But there is no hive mind community stance on this.
Yes. People support and even encourage their friends to leave struggling relationships sometimes.
I think there is lots of other advice that people give... like get your ass some therapy. If someone is not poly and isn't cool with being poly - then forcing them into a lifestyle like that isn't cool. End of the day, if they aren't poly, no amount of trying to convince them is going to change their minds. If you can't be with just one person and they a monogamous, it's time to cut ties. Hopefully you are not springing it on them 10 years and 3 kids into a marriage. All this should be disclosed near the first date and definitely before sex occurs. Sadly, so many people don't.
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- 2 months ago
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- reddit.com/r/polyamoryad...
I think you are over estimating how interested other people are in encouraging people to stay in struggling relationships. In monogamy or polyamory. Im sorry to tell you, no one out there is actively trying to save your relationships because you are in therapy. No one is advocating for you. This isn't how life works.