This has a few paragraphs but I tried to keep it as basic as I can while still explaining the situation.

I had been requesting more alone time and intimate time with my partner (together 3.5 yrs) when I found out how much he’s been seeing some of his other partners recently. Like past two months. Much more quality time than him and I. He did decently at his response but promised me I would be taken care of later in the week, only for me to be told that he and another partner played together yet again. That rubbed me the wrong way but I know things aren’t always fair and I tried to move past it.

The following week he and I went on a friends date night where he purposefully didn’t tell me that a crush of his was going to be there. We had even joked that it would be a date night between him and I… I thought it was nice he got to see her but something about it rubbed me the wrong way.

Then, I got unexpectedly called into work. An emergency. When I was changing into work clothes after he and I got home, he casually mentioned that he invited his potential new partner over to chat about a certain thing he knew about. I stress cleaned since the house was a mess. He didn’t tell me until I actually got to work that she had accepted.

For the next four hours, they cuddled on the couch, talking about sex and personal life stuff and etc. He did not mention any of this and purposefully left the physical touch out of it. We have a camera in the living room and after 2 hours during work I decided to check to see if the coast was clear for me to come home again. So I saw their date night that he later admitted he didn’t want to tell me about before hand.

I freaked out and ended up looking at his phone the next day. He hadn’t mentioned how frequently he had been seeing her when he told me he’d be going to see friends in the evenings. He’d still be around friends but they were clearly flirting and texting about talking about how much they desired each other during those nights. Or how much they sexted. He denied that they had sexted despite the sexy photos and suggestive comments and explicitly describing sex acts they wanted to do together. They’ve known each other for less than two weeks and they’ve texted back and forth about a hundred times each day… sometimes even while I was on the phone with him. And, worse, I thought back to how early on in his and my relationship, he would frequently not participate well when I would try sexting with him. He complained I didn’t do well at it. But reading him and his new partner sexting, I saw that she was saying a lot of things I’d frequently try to bring into texts, and he actually responded more enthusiastically than he had with me.

All of this, after he never mentioned he was even seeing her and only told me she had asked him once to do a non-sexual kink scene together.

So all of this I can’t tell if he was in the wrong or if I just blew up without any cause. But this is the first relationship of his that when I think about them talking and moving forward that I feel actually sick to my stomach.

Any advice here? Thanks in advance.