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29 [r4r] London is boundary crossing in polyamory cheating?
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moomingirl1357 is a redditor age 29 looking for a redditor in London, UK
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Is a boundary being crossed in polyamory cheating?

I f have been with my husband m for 13 years..we have been poly since 2020 on and off (mainly due to COVID) recently we've changed the premises on our relationship and started doing full solo dates.. we have a boundary set regarding texting that we don't go through each others phones out of respect but if we ever asked it was ok.. I set a boundary that whatever happens when with other people is fine it's no one else's business but no s.x during text (flirting fine) due to possible need to use each others phones and not wanting to see something we may not like (jealousy is healthy but doesn't mean it don't suck) I accidentally clicked a message on his phone this evening and whilst coming off that app saw a very memorable app that has s*x GIFs being sent into a message with someone. I didn't read any messages due to not wanting to break the boundary that was set but knew it was then s.xting and when pushed further was told pics have also been shared but apparently he didn't know it was s.xting (sending videos of women being railed tied up isn't s.xting)

I just want to know in polyamory is this classed as cheating and what kind of advice would you give as I'm just hurt that I'm in this situation with very little reassurance.

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Posted
1 year ago